Guide to Anal Training


Are you ready to try anal sex for the first time? Or maybe you have tried it before and found it painful or unsuccessful. Either way, you’ve come to the right place! In this guide, we will explain how to prepare for comfortable and enjoyable anal sex with your partner. 

What is anal training? 

Anal training involves slowly stretching the muscles around the anus to make it easier to insert larger objects. Emphasis on gradual. Anal training takes time, but is essential for comfortable anal sex. When having anal sex, proper lubrication and preparation reduce the risk of injury.

Click here to shop our favorite anal training sets

First, let's discuss what to look for when choosing an anal training kit!

Choosing a Training Set

Determine your goal: Start by determining your girth goal. How far do you need to stretch to comfortably have anal sex with your partner?

Bust out the measuring tape and measure around your partner’s erect penis at the thickest part of the shaft. That number is your girth goal and will determine which training system makes sense for you. Purchase a training set that maxes out at or a little larger than your partner’s girth.

Silolis Anal Training sets were designed using actual penile girth statistics, and our sizes span the range from the first percentile to the 99.99th percentile. You can click HERE to see our detailed sizing guide based on your partner's girth and your anal play experience level.

Body Safe Materials: Many people may be shocked to learn that manufacturers use materials in many sex toys that are not considered body safe. The FDA does not regulate the adult toy industry, so consumers must educate themselves on what is safe.

Some adult toys are made from porous materials that can hold onto bacteria even after being cleaned thoroughly. Even worse, some adult toys are made from materials that are known to be toxic or cancer causing. For more information, you can read our article about body safe materials HERE. The tl;dr is that platinum cured silicone, borosilicate glass, and stainless steel are considered the safest options.

Anal Safe Design: Your rectum connects to your colon and the rest of your digestive system. This means that if a toy gets fully inserted, it can actually be pulled into your colon, making it difficult to retrieve without emergency medical intervention.

Anal toys should always have a flared base that is wider than the widest insertable part of the toy to prevent it from being fully inserted. In particular, butt plugs with small round bases (you often see these made of metal with a jewel on the bottom) pose a risk of complete insertion; T-shaped bases are a safer option. In addition, you should also avoid anything with sharp angles that could cut or puncture you internally.

Gradual Size Increases:¬†Choose a training set that increases in size very gradually from one piece to the next.¬†The typical rule of thumb is no more than .25‚ÄĚ (.64 cm) in diameter increase from one size to the next.

Colorful Anal Training set with lines comparison

Efficient Design:  The goal of anal training is to stretch the anal sphincter muscle, make sure that the set you purchase is designed to actually achieve this goal. 

The majority of training sets consist of a series of 3 butt plugs.  However, butt plugs typically have very narrow necks, meaning that once the bulb is inserted, the sphincter will adjust down to the narrow neck size and very little anal dilation will be achieved.

A better option is to look for training sets that utilize dildos or wands for stretching and coordinated butt plugs to help maintain dilation before moving on to a larger wand. The design of wands naturally allows the user to rest at the largest section of the toy, achieving more efficient dilation than plugs alone.  Plugs are great for maintaining progress in between wands, but they are not very good at actual dilation and stretching.

Silolis Anal Training sets have been designed with all of these factors in mind to create the ideal anal training experience that is far superior to plug-only anal training sets.

Now that you know everything to look for in the perfect training set, let’s discuss how to train!


Tips for Anal Training

Start Small: You may want to sit on a towel to do your training. Begin by applying lube to your anus and fingers. Gently work one or two fingers inside your anus until it feels comfortable. If your sphincter feels too tight, try bearing down gently like you're using the bathroom to help open your muscles.

Next, apply lube to your smallest plug or wand from your anal training kit and insert it slowly, taking breaks if you feel discomfort.  If you are using a Silolis Anal Training set, you would rest at the widest section of wand 1 until it feels completely comfortable, then you would insert plug 1 and go about your day until you are ready to stretch further using wand 2.

Reapply lube as needed- anal training requires lots of lube! Give your body plenty of time to adjust to each size before moving on to the next size in your set. You may spend several days at one size before you feel ready to move to the next size.

Once you are able to comfortably rest at the girth of your partner's penis, you have reached your girth goal and are ready to attempt anal sex! Click HERE to read about Tips for Anal Sex.

Expect the Expected: When engaging in anal play, you may encounter feces. While this can be awkward, it is nothing to be embarrassed about. To minimize the chances of finding poop on your toys, consider using an anal douche before training. Whether you see feces or not, you should always clean your toys after each use with an adult toy cleaner.

Take Your Time: If you are new to anal play, its important to set your expectations. Preparing for comfortable partnered anal sex will probably take several days, or possibly several weeks. 

Once you’ve trained up to your goal a few times, training will become much faster. Some people who have significant experience may be able to prepare for anal sex in an hour or less. Take the amount of time that is right for your body, and communicate openly with your partner about how much time you need.  

Proper training allows the anal sphincter to stretch slowly, which reduces your risk of injury such as anal fissures and hemorrhoids.  Anal training also makes anal sex more pleasurable for both partners. Click HERE for an example beginner training schedule.

Use Lube:  Lube is necessary for all anal sex activities, including training. Use plenty and reapply frequently. Check to make sure your lube is safe to use with your training set. Water based lube is safe with all toys. Silicone lube and hybrid lube may not be compatible with silicone toys and can cause toys to degrade over time.  

Solo Play: Many people find that they are more comfortable with anal play when they are able to explore it solo at first. This takes away the stress of impressing your partner and lets you try out what feels good. 

Women may discover that exploring anal play on their own can enhance their enjoyment of anal sex with a partner. Click HERE for 10 tips to make anal fun for women!

Listen to Your Body: We advise against the use of numbing creams during anal play. Pain is a signal from your body that something is not right. If you feel pain, stop and figure out what is causing it.  Sex is supposed to feel good for both partners, and anal sex is no exception!  

Depth vs Girth Training: We’re focusing on girth training, it's important to understand that depth training is generally considered riskier than girth training. 

Anal sex happens in the rectum; the rectum depth varies, but is usually 5-6 inches long (12-16 cm). At the end of the rectum is the sigmoid bend, which leads into the colon. Depth training involves inserting toys past the sigmoid bend; this can be painful and comes with an increased risk of injury. 

Anal training should be fun and low pressure, just like anal sex!  Take the time to find the perfect training set for you.  A great training set will be made of body safe materials and have an anal safe design (flared base that is wider that the widest insertable part), the sizing will increase gradually to allow for dilation that is comfortable and slow, it will include wands as well as plugs for the most efficient dilation of the sphincter muscle, and it will max out at your partner's penis girth to make sure you are properly prepared for anal sex.  During training, remember to start small, go slow, use lots of lube, pay attention to your body's cues, and stop if you feel pain. 

When you're ready, check out How to Have Anal Sex!

Click here to read about Anal Pleasure for Women

Click here to read about Anal Pleasure for Men